It has been suggested to me recently to stop talking about some of the more embarrassing issues my son has in such a public manner. I was told that I owe him a greater legacy than posting about his poop play/ingestion because he doesn't have a voice to disagree. I'd like to assure everyone that even though he is MOSTLY non-verbal, he DOES have a voice and he knows how to use it when he finds it important enough to do so. Aidan tells him mommy "no, no" quite often. He tells his sister too. Aidan's voice becomes stronger every day and I won't settle on anyone pigeon-holing him to be non-verbal and without a voice his whole life. I will not treat him differently because he is autistic. I am a parent of TWO whole children. One of them has autism, the other does not. Each of them has different needs at different times and I address them and parent them as needed on a situational basis just like any other parent. Aside from those situational differences, BOTH of my children will be equally loved, cared for, joked with, and EMBARRASSED; just as each of us has been by our parents and as each of us try to do for our kids. How can I teach my kids about tolerance and equality and how to work hard through their difficulties if I give concessions for their difficulties based on a label of "autism". I am not parenting autism, I am parenting children. I am not an autistic mother, I am a mother.
My mother made fun of me and told lots of stories about how I played with my poop like a little "artist". It embarrassed me, but it didn't kill me.. and perhaps it even helped me develop important qualities like the HUMILITY to be able to take being made fun of at times and the ability to make fun of my self and UNDERSTANDING of the fact that no matter how different we all are we all started out as babies pooping ourselves and SOMETIMES even playing and eating our poop. I want to give my kids the same opportunity to learn the same lessons. AND.. as a parent; this is one of the few issues I get to share with parents that have "neuro-typical" children.
My facebook is viewable only to friends.. and some friends of friends.. not to everyone in the whole world. I didn't post my issues in the newspaper. I didn't exclaim them over the tv or the radio. I put them on facebook; a social network filled with my friends, so my friends can know what's going on with me and my family. I also have a blog, but still doesn't get read by all of humanity; only my "6 followers" and other people with similar issues that may just benefit from relating to me when they have a hard time relating to other parents; like I do. This is one of the big things that happens in this family..if you can't hang I understand, but PLEASE stop judging how I parent and stop criticizing what you can't possibly understand. This is how I parent. I LOVE how I parent. It's not always perfect, but its the best I can offer my kids. Anyone that thinks thats not enough can take off. That's that. :-p
